My Treat & Delight

I cannot believe that tomorrow is the last day of 2009. I am sure that this does not come as a surprise nor am I likely to be alone in this one. This time last year, I was anxiously awaiting Jan 2nd when I wound finally get to return to work after being out for 7 mos with my leukemia treatment. To say that I was anxious really, really does not do it justice. I was as scared to return to work and treat patients as I had ever been-even when I was just starting out. It is amazing how much this line of work requires concentration and a good memory as well as well, there is no way to say it modestly, intelligence. I felt that 7 mos at home had left me dull and unprepared. Luckily that first week back, my boss let me work part-time to get me back up to speed (call it work hardening)and my patients were those easy walk-in types with colds, flus, and diabetes follow ups. I rememeber how tired I was at the end of the day and would just fall into bed exhausted. I am sure that I was suffering from some lingering effects of the chemo too, but my brain took the longest to bounce back. Some days I am not sure that will ever be the same because my memory is not as sharp as it once was. My other menopausal friends tell me they are the same so maybe we are all in this boat together-chemo or no.
Today is actually my last workday of 2009 so the next time I come back into work, it will be my 1 year anniversary of being back. Unless you have experienced that for yourself, you cannot imagine what a treat and delight it is to be here now. And I mean that in all sense of the word. I love that I am still here to enjoy my work, my colleagues, my co-workers. I love that I know how to enjoy today w/o worry about tomorrow or yesterday (buddhists call it being in the present). I love that my precious girlfriend, family, and friends have seen me through so much. My resolution for the New Year is to write more, think more, and keep on keeping on. Sounds delightful, doesn't it?

Merry Christmas

My family has been visiting for Christmas from the far flung reaches of SC and Ga. As there was a good bit of snow leftover from last w-e's snowstorm, those southern kids were happy. I took them sledding near UNCA. I kept checking periodically to see if they were ready to go stop and head back to the house. Despite the cold and the wind they kept at it for a long time. But once Ethan did a face plant, as he put it, and Emma's fingers were icy from being cold and wet, they called it quits. We had a great time and I'm really glad they still had snow to experience on this trip. When you live in the deep south as they all do, you can remember almost every snow you experience as a child, and it's special. In fact, it was one of the reasons we hosted Christmas for everyone this year. And we were lucky enough to have snow for them to enjoy. Unfortunately, rain moved in last night, and it was cold, windy and raw. Not such great weather for sledding. Oh well.

I know that this will come as a bit of a surprise, but he kids wanted to open their presents on Christmas eve. Whole parts of the living room had been given over to gifts piled high. The tree, our measly little artificial number, could barely contain our gifts much less all the ones from grandparents, aunts, and uncles for the little ones. Suffice to say that it looked like a tornado had torn through a toy store after they were finished unwrapping all of those gifts last night. The Asheville house is pretty small by today's standards, but it seems really small with 13 people, 4 dogs and mounds of Christmas presents.

I was able to snap this photo of Santa last night as one of the mini but mighty rein-dachsunds arrived at our house

Have a Merry Christmas!!!

Mama's 95th Birthday

My family congregated in Charleston SC this past w-e to celebrate my grandmother's 95th birthday. We met most of Charleston at the Elks Lodge for the big birthday bash. There was music, food, and lots of pictures. Most of my cousins are on Facebook and there is even a Fralix family account where everyone seems to post old pictures from our younger days. I suspect quite a few of the photos from the party are already posted there. I include a picture or two here because well, I'm not on Facebook. I have trouble enough just keeping this blog current, or current enough.

It was great to see my Mama and behold that whole room filled with people, all of whom are directly or indirectly related to her. Pretty cool as well to imagine all the impact she has made and the legacy she leaves by pondering all the people there.

I had hoped to drive to Asheville on Saturday, but the snowy weather keep me in Charleston for an extra day. I did make it there Sunday just in time to attend the Swannanoa Solstice concert with Donna and Susan. That was really a feast for the eyes and ears with various acoustic instruments played, a show with panoramic photos of the mtns in winter splendor, and even a group that performed Scottish step dancing. It was quite a Christmas treat-thank you both for giving us that. Fabulous!

Well, as it is now December 22nd, we are past the shortest day of the year and can celebrate the light returning again. I so look forward to this time of year because I love the light so much. I have a touch of that seasonal affective disorder so my mood is brighter when we have more daylight. I can get more done and enjoy those few extra minutes of light with a longer run or piddling outside. Only 6 more months to June and the longest day of the year. But we have winter and spring to go through first.
Merry Christmas and enjoy the light!

Running with the Girls

There is a terrific organization called Girls on the Run that holds a 5K race every December in Asheville to raise money for their scholarship fund. GOTR teaches girls to be active and healthy through running and jogging, just my kind of fun in other words. A few Saturdays ago my friend Donna Z and I ran their 5K which was held on the UNC Asheville campus. There were loads of girls (and boys for that matter, and parents of course) congregated by school to attend the event. We ran 3 loops around the main campus, one of the flatter runs I've ever done in Asheville. Donna, who has been toying with the idea of running again after many years off, joined me for the fun. Everyone got a #1 race bib and "earned" a ribbon for finishing the run. I like that they have made it less competitive and more about showing up and participating. It was a cold raw day, about 24 F, and I give many thanks and kudos to Donna for joining in on the fun in that weather. That's a tough draw for your first running event.

Happy Birthday & Congratulations!

Today is my stepfather's 70th birthday. It is also the last day of his chemo and radiation for a brain tumour. I don't know which is a bigger thing to celebrate, but then he certainly doesn't have to choose. I am relieved and proud of how well he has done. It is never fun to hear that you have cancer-much less that you have to have surgery, chemo and radiation. But he has handled it so well. I wish that I had a current picture to post here, but this one is from the morning he went in for surgery.

I extend a big hug of support and relief to my Mom, too, who has had to worry right along with him.

Congratulations to you both! Happy 70th Birthday VBJ!

The Nice Volunteer Lady

I am writing early on the last day of our Monterey trip. All of the people attending Holly’s conference had the afternoon off to explore the area or whatever yesterday afternoon. I had a coffee in one of the local cafes and asked what we should do that is nearby. The barista recommended a hike in Point Lobos State Reserve which we had actually passed on our way to Big Sur. It was gorgeous-lots of hikes along the headlands with views of birds, seals, otters, and sea lions. There was even a nice volunteer lady at the info station (and I say nice because it was one cold and raw and windy day to be sitting out just waiting for 2 little tourists from NC who don’t know the 1st thing about those pinnipeds). Anyway it seemed that each turn was more spectacular than the last especially as the sun made its arc over the sky illuminating different parts of the rocks, bluffs, cypress, and coves. We saw several places with protected inlets where the water was a true emerald color. There were birds galore. The nice volunteer lady said that she had seen 2 whales earlier in the day, but not knowing what to look for, I can only say that I saw alot of surf. Maybe one of those spurts was a whale spout. Who knows? Could be.

We also tried to cram in another trip to a bird sanctuary called the Elkhorn Slough before Holly had to be back for a big reception, but a guy was just closing the gate for the day when we arrived. It was about 30 mins north of Monterery and tucked away down a bunch of rural roads. I wasn’t disappointed though because we got to see a lot of rural farmland-many farmstands advertising avocados 5 for $1, artichokes 3 for $1, broccoli 2 for $1, well you get the idea. It was pretty, rich land that must grow alot of what we eat back east too. In fact, we passed a big Dole plant sitting next to one of the farms. Cool views even though we missed the slough.

The nice volunteer lady at the info station had a green State Park service jacket and official, green ranger pants. I knew that she was a volunteer rather than a paid ranger because she had a big patch on her sleeve that said “volunteer” (I’m smart and observant that way, tee hee). The State Parks out here are really suffering with the California budget cuts. So it was really nice of her to spend her time sitting out in the cold, as I said, to help us learn more about the features of her park. It got me thinking about the research I read recently about how doing kind things for others helps people who have serious medical conditions. One article I saw in the NY Times was about a woman who had been diagnosed with MS in her 30’s and wasn't doing well either physically or emotionally. One of her doctors told her to try doing things for others to take her mind off her condition. She decided to give 29 gifts to others, one a day for a month-sometimes actual gifts, sometimes gifts of kindness or helpfulness. She felt it improved her MS symptoms so she wrote a book about it (called something obvious like "29 gifts".) There are scientists actually doing research on why that helps. Personally I think it takes your mind off your own problems, forces you to concentrate on the needs of someone else, and diminishes whatever difficult symptoms you’re experiencing. Having a bad day or just feeling crabby? Do something nice for someone else. There is always someone worse off to help and they’ll appreciate it.

Along that same vein, I remember when I was being treated last year for my leukemia and couldn’t work. I was very sad about that. I had worked through my breast cancer treatment, just taking off the days I was sick from the chemo wallops. The leukemia kept my cell counts so low that I couldn’t be around the general public much less the going to the doctor public. It made me feel quite useless. I was kind of crabby and listless at one point early on in my treatment and couldn’t figure out why. Then I saw a young woman being treated for her scleroderma, a condition that causes the skin, fingers, and connective tissue to stiffen. I first saw her in the hospital on one of my admissions then again in the clinic. I spoke to her and her family, which just lit me up inside. I felt for just a moment like I was back in my clinic talking to a patient and her family. That helped me understand all of that irritableness I had been feeling. I wasn’t doing anything for anyone else. I just had to live with that for a while. I am very happy now to be back at work, to be helping other people. And if you come to me with the blues, I’m gonna write you a prescription for 29 gifts-to give others.

More of Monterey

Holly scooted out to her meeting early this morning and I went for a long jog on the road we had driven yesterday to head south to Big Sur. We had found a back way from Cannery Row up a long steep hill to Hwy 68 that leads past the tiny town of Pacific Grove on to Hwy 1, the Oceanview Hwy that heads to Carmel and then to Big Sur. This morning, I made essentially a big loop with the trail from Old Monterey, the historic district where we are staying, then on to Cannery Row, left up the big steep hill with incredible views (My Mom once commented that I always manage to find a big hill or mtn to live on. Its the views, Mom. I also manage to run them when I can-tourist or no). I ran along Hwy 68 around the old Presidio base for several miles, amongst the tall Eucalyptus and Redwood trees, and back to Monterey via Hwy 1. It took me an hour and 54 mins, the longest run I've done since the Asheville Half-marathon in September. I pulled my hamstring in that one and had to take 6 weeks completely off from running. What a bummer that was! This getting old stuff is tricky. Healing just isn't as fast as it once was. Oh well, I am better now and had a terrific run in a terrific town up a terrific hill. What a sweet and fortunate life I have!

Monterey

I am writing this from our hotel room in Monterey California. Holly is attending a meeting here for her association, the American Society of Clinical Veterinary Pathologists. That’s a mouthful for sure, but they use their abbreviation mostly, ASCVP, which makes it a bit more manageable. We flew out early Friday morning dodging the snowstorm in Houston (yes that Houston) where we changed planes, bound for California. Though I usually think of California as warm and sunny, even Monterey which is about 2 hours south of San Francisco, is cool and cloudy this time of year. We are staying in an upscale hotel near Fisherman’s Wharf and the marina, so the views are great, cool and cloudy or no.

This morning we took advantage of Holly’s break from the meeting to drive 30 miles south on Hwy 1 to Big Sur. I’d read about a fun place to eat called the Big Sur bakery, but they were closed for winter break. Not to be daunted, we grabbed a few Big Sur bars from the deli next door and headed to Andrew Molerno State park and the Venta Wildlife Society center. They are doing work with California condors, which have become nearly extinct. The hike along the coastal trail was spectacular with lots of hawks, falcons, and many little birds (sadly no condors observed by us anyway). The trail meandered by the river and up the bluff for a terrific view of the coastline. The sun even came out during the hike back to the car, so we were able to enjoy all the beautiful things we’d seen on the way out, not only from a different perspective but with better light. We commented on how the California coast is so different from the beaches we know and love in North and South Carolina. Here the sand is nothing more than a small strip - strewn with old logs, kelp, and rocks- while the NC beaches are wide, sandy and full of shells. The NC dunes may be 10 ft high, but here in California, the bluffs extend up hundreds of feet. Both coasts are beautiful, just different.

Last night we tried a sampler of the microbrews here at the hotel pub. They were okay, nothing too stellar. At this point, we are hopheads, and spoiled ones at that. Asheville has so many fine breweries, and we’ve grown accustomed to those bitter beers as one of my pals put it. It was fun, though, to try out what they have locally; you never know when you’ll find something new you really enjoy.

I read a great book on the flight out here. We often listen to public radio on our journeys to and from Asheville. Last Sunday, we were listening to a program about religion and heard an interview with the Rev. Kate Braestrup who is a chaplain for the Maine Warden and Game service. She goes out with them on missing person cases or when a body has been discovered. Her job is to be there for the families and to counsel the Game Wardens if necessary. She sounded like the wisest counselor I’d ever heard, and I decided to check out her memoir “Here if you need me.” Not only is she a wise counselor and Reverend, but she writes well too. It turns out that she was a writer before becoming a Unitarian minister in her second career. If you’re looking for a peaceful, uplifting, hope inspiring book check it out. Our little Hillsborough library had it, and Amazon sells it too, of course. Now I’ve moved on to the new one by the author of “The Time Traveler’s Wife.” It’s a good one too, but I haven’t finished it yet ( “Her Fearful Symmetry” by Audrey Niffenegger.)

Again, our little Hillsborough library astounds me. I just finished perusing the list of 100 Notable books from the NY Times Book review and ordered several of them from the online library catalog. In 2 days, my books were waiting for me just a half-mile from the house. Amazing! Call me a Luddite, but there is no technology better or more satisfying that the public library. While I enjoy reading some of the NY Times online, I much prefer the paper version. Call me old school, but I enjoy holding a real book in my hands. I hope that I am dead and gone long before books appear solely in electronic form. And I hope that our little Hillsborough library (shall I abbreviate it OLHL from now on?) keeps on ordering all of those fantastic books. OLHL is moving, though, to a bigger space downtown next to the new Weaver St Market and big parking garage. I’ll have a bit of a longer walk for my books, ~ 1 mile from the house instead of half a mile, but the new space is going to be much larger. Eventually, there will be a walking trail, too, that goes right along the river past the library, Weaver St Market, and out to Occoneechee Mtn. That will be really cool.

We Ate with Thanks & Gratitude

WE GAVE THANKS
I never got the chance to write about Thanksgiving after the holiday. It was full of fun and food and fellowship, just as I knew it would be. We did take a short hike on the Mountains-to-Sea trail before dinner Thursday. Little mini but mighty (Riley the amazing, hiking dachshund) led the way from Craven Gap - where Town Mountain Rd meets up with the Blue Ridge Parkway- some 4 miles further south. We had a bit of a snafu or situation as some would call it, when Miriam and Alex got separated from the main group and ended up heading down from the ridge on a different trail. With cell phones and Marty hoofing it to get back to them, we were all reunited safely.

Dinner was quite a feast as you can see from my plate here in one of the photos. Holly did a fabulous job of cooking the turkey, which was very delicious. Everything was yummy in fact. Glad we did the hike before the meal because there would not have been a big hike after that big, filling meal.

Friday morning early, early, crazy early, Alex and Debbie went out for a little Black Friday shopping. Alex wanted to go to Wal-mart, of all places, to buy a Gameboy she saw on sale. Best I could tell, Debbie was just along for the fun, though she did come home with some prizes too. They struck paydirt in Weaverville, where the lines weren’t as long as those in Asheville. And I think, they managed to buy everything they set out to find on sale. I was skeptical they would really go at “O Dark Hundred,” as we say in my family, but they did, later relating all the fun they had. I will say that they got some great deals for their sacrificed sleep.
Maybe that needs to be part of the tradition from now on. Someone has to get up really early and brave the lines to snag an excellent deal. I'll add that one to the list.